kenoscomm | open to all | questions and apologies

Entry tags:

open to all | questions and apologies

[ if you’re lucky, you’ve never heard this voice before. if you have, you’ll probably notice that he seems considerably less grouchy than he did making his greeting rounds in springstar and highstorm. tony has had time to settle in, and more importantly, he’s made some big decisions about what side he wants to support here.

…for now, at least, which is the quiet motivation behind his demanding communion. he seems utterly at home invading people’s minds, and there’s the sense of him stretching out like he’s been here the whole time and was just waiting for you to get home. ]

People here are from all different worlds, right?

[ rhetorical question, and he continues. ]

I want to hear from whoever’s been to Terra. The third planet in the Sol System. I know some of you call it Earth—the fact that you have a name for it means that you know about it. [ a pause. ] I’ll torture the knowledge out of you if I have to, but it’s easier for everyone if you just cough it up.

[ that seems to be the end of that, unless you’re a zenite, to which he then narrows his focus. ]

…sorry if you heard me say I want all the humans to die. I know we have to work together.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[ Aaaand Amos' confusion is back. ]

Never said it was a sacred land. Fuck, there definitely wasn't anything sacred about where I grew up.

[ kid where did you even get that one from ]

[ tony is putting things together. there are people from different timelines and different worlds entirely, which means amos is either from far enough in the past that terra was not yet considered sacred, or he’s from a world where it never was at all.

tony’s not sure which, but since he’s sussed out that amos can at least keep up with his own spacefaring ways, he has to assume it’s the former. humans just haven’t left yet. ]

Where I’m from, it is. It’s so sacred that you humans…

[ there’s the sense that he’s really being cautious about his words, since he’s talking to amos. so he tries again, one syllable less and accordingly more polite. ]

…that humans won’t tell us where it is.

[ Confused blink. Tony's amendment goes right over his head, since Amos is now of the opinion that he doesn't really mean what he's saying about humans and whatnot, which means there's no longer any reason to take offence. ]

Really? That's weird. Everyone knew where it was where I'm from. It would've been hard to miss, since almost everyone was still living in Sol.

[ He takes a moment to think it over. ]

I mean, it's the one planet we knew of that could support us — good gravity, breathable air, drinkable water, edible food. I went out to Ilus and the food thing was definitely a bit of a problem in the early days. I guess that's why Earth was considered sacred? Kinda needed it to still live.

[ A beat. ]

What'd you say to people when you were looking for it?

[ Was Tony actually being serious in wishing death to all humans earlier? He didn't just need a juice box and a nap?? ]

[ even “living in sol” is a bit strange. they have the name of terra, they have the system it’s in, but humans have spread so far out from it that getting the exact location has been the challenge for as long as the mu have been searching. he doesn’t even know if the average human knows where it is, only that it’s in a safe, distant location where interlopers cannot harm it. ]

“Ilus,” huh…

[ he doesn’t know it, but he takes note of it for later when he’s not being asked a question. if it’s a livable planet, then…

well, technically there are no livable planets anymore. he has to keep reminding himself of that. ]

…Grandpa is the one who handled all that stuff, but he’s always been way too nice. Even when we had a hostage, he didn’t do anything. He was just trying to convince him that we’re peaceful.

Nice isn't so bad. I mean, not like it's nice to have a hostage, but I don't think torture really works. Then people'll just say whatever shit comes into their heads to get it to stop.

[ He's chipper enough as he talks about this, like it's all some sort of hypothetical and not anything that could possibly happen to him, so why should he care? Just carrying on about his day, as normal as anything else. ]

Your grandpa sounds like a good guy though. Maybe nobody knew and that's why they never told you. But you know now, right?

[ Kinda pointless since Earth has been gone for a while now, but it clearly meant something to Tony. If he knows now then it should be all good, Amos figures. ]

[ tony somehow isn’t satisfied, though. with amos’ description, it sounds like terra wasn’t all it’s cracked up to be, but then what does that leave them with? even if tony were to return, what would be the point when the planet that jomy has sacrificed everything for is some “slum” where people don’t have enough to eat? in that case, isn’t it better to find somewhere else to go?

there doesn’t seem to be an easy answer, and tony’s inability to just leave it at that rumbles low in the connection of their communion. at least he knows it’s not something amos can fix. ]

Torture works if you can read minds.

[ getting that out there, even if he sounds distracted. his heart isn’t in the indignant defense. ]

Ugh… I guess it’s not like it matters anymore. When Grandpa wakes up, I’ll just tell him there’s no reason to keep looking for Terra.

[ There's a slight sense of hesitation from Amos at that little rumble from Tony, but it can probably be ignored, right? At least until any sense of Amos' emotions or easy-going nature or any of it shorts out for a second at the idea of reading minds.

What,

Is this kid okay,

Pause. ]

You can read minds? [ Tony probably would not have said it if he could not, but that's a... hell of a revelation to suddenly learn. ] Is that... are you okay?

[ There isn't any disbelief in the question; Amos more focused on if Tony is okay, apparently having that ability, than asking if Tony is crazy. He's immature, maybe, but not crazy. Probably.

Like. He could tell him that they'll just build a new Terra or whatever when Zenith wins, but that seems very secondary at the moment — because nobody is winning any time soon, and also he would really like to know if Tony is okay. ]

[ amos’ concern—genuine, as far as tony can tell without reading his mind—comes as a surprise. it’s not like before, when tony was outwardly having a fit and clearly needed to be handled gently. it’s just that the idea of being able to read minds is somehow shocking to amos, and worth asking after tony’s… what? physical health? his mental health?

obviously, his mental health is quite strong. he can read minds, after all. ]

Yeah.

[ he confirms it with caution, clearly not used to this reaction. ]

What, do you think I’m some kind of monster now?

[ there’s a dare there—go ahead, prove you’re like all the other humans after all. ]

No.

[ The answer comes quick and without hesitation. He ignores Tony's surprise to focus on answering his question; no, you're not a monster. ]

I've been around monsters before. [ I am one. I think. ] Powers or abilities aren't what make 'em; how they treat people is. What they do to them. Torturing ain't a good start, but monsters don't know they gotta work with other people. They don't care about other people. Or anything other than themselves, and I don't think that's you.

[ Talk about your grandpa again, Tony...

There's a rock steady presence to Amos' communion, as though he's speaking straight up facts and knows it. But after a moment it lightens up, like the issue is behind him all of a sudden. Not worth thinking about. (He'd prefer not to think about it; doesn't want to accidentally start describing himself.) ]

Besides, not like we're gonna have monsters in the new world. So that means you wouldn't be one. Right?

[ Like — it really should be that simple. ]

[ tony would insist that it is him, as if he has something to prove, but that’s only childish defiance. he doesn’t want to be called a monster, let alone actually be one by any metric. why amos cares about how tony thinks of himself, however, tony doesn’t understand.

as the communion lightens, so does the weight on his shoulders and he breathes out. ]

…yeah.

[ he feels fidgety. while amos may not be peering into his heart, tony is giving himself the internal gaze of a lifetime, and he desperately wishes jomy were here to help talk him through some of these confusing new aspects of socializing with a people he had entirely written off.

—and, in some ways, his own people he had written off. they may not even exist anymore, but amos’ description of what makes a monster makes him feel guilty and unpleasant. ]

Grandpa always asked me to work for the sake of the others, so that’s what I want to do. I just… dunno how. Without him here.

[ There are a lot of things Amos can't pick up on within the space of communion — often the nuances of emotions, because those tend to be lost on him in the best of times, and the best of times would definitely include having direct access to them. But being fidgety? That's impossible to misunderstand, and so he takes a step back, pauses. Does he try to reassure Tony... give him space...

Those words strike a chord with him, and so: reassure it is. ]

I know how you feel. I've needed people to help me my whole life.

[ There is the sensation of Amos tentatively reaching out. Were they in person he'd be trying to grasp Tony's shoulder as if that would steady him; through communion he is... trying the communion equivalent of that. Solidarity? ]

I think you can try to remember what he'd say to you if you get stuck, but I know it can be easy to forget. You get lost in the moment. It slips your mind. It don't come natural.

[ Is he close? Is this how empathizing works?? Amos hesitates for a second, wondering if he should be talking about himself this much, before figuring he might as well plow ahead to the inevitable conclusion. ]

I haven't had anyone from my old life with me in a long time, so I try to focus on what Yima would want me to do. It helps. Not gonna say I don't fuck up sometimes, but if I know I got her to focus on, then I figure I'll probably be alright more often than not.

[ it’s confusing and scary to hear amos mention his “old life” as something separate from how he lives now; tony isn’t ready to let go of that, even if he’s chosen zenith. even so, everything else is steady and reassuring—at least, insofar as amos seems so sure of what he’s saying that tony can take heart that someone knows what’s going on.

no, he can’t see himself deferring to yima in the way that amos does, but he can try to imagine what jomy would want for him. ]

I’ve never been without him. I…

[ there’s hesitation on his side, too. he doesn’t know why he’s telling amos this, when amos is just some guy that’s been nice to him. they’re not friends, and he’s not even a fellow mu. ]

I had to grow up. When my planet was destroyed, Grandpa needed my help. So I forced myself into this body, but… [ he’s not an adult, but neither is he a child anymore. he’s just lonely. ] This is the first time I’ve ever been away from him.

[ Oh.

There is the sense of clarity washing over Amos. Comprehension. Tony is just a kid, and with that realization comes a fierce sense of protectiveness: Amos ready to wrap his arms around him, kill anyone who would try to hurt him now. Tony needs help, and so he has decided: he will help him. ]

I think I know where you're coming from. I had to grow up too fast, too. [ Not like Tony did. Not literally. But the principles apply. ] And when I had to leave behind the woman who raised me... I didn't know what to do without her, either. So, I hear you. It's tough.

[ And his presence is gentle; an extended hand, if Tony wants to take it. ]

I can help you, if you need someone. I haven't been through what you have, but in a way, I think I've already lived it. So if you need help taking that next step... I'll take it with you.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

open to all | questions and apologies

no subject

apologize to baltimore now

i'm sorry baltimore, i just don't like seafood

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject